Voluntary Hardship.
We are living in a time when any number of opportunities for pleasure can be accessed instantaneously - you can have world-class food delivered to your doorstep, you can order designer shoes and clothing with a click of a button, or you can play games or watch videos specifically designed to manipulate your brain chemistry. I think as a society we are currently reckoning with the fallout from this phenomenon - folks coming to terms with the fact that eventually their “pleasure well” runs dry. The likes/comments stop providing that momentary feel-good spark, the next tiktok is not as exciting as the million watched prior, and the fourth amazon purchase of the week more evidently hasn’t filled the space that’s truly empty.
Ideally, when folks realize that the “pleasure well” is starting to run dry, they begin looking for a new “well”. Meaning, rather than continuing on an endless (and fruitless) pursuit of pleasure/comfort/validation, they instead start a journey of finding real fulfillment. For this post however, rather than talking about “new wells” (I have/will in other posts), instead I wanted to write briefly on a concept that can work in tandem with the process of looking for a new “well” - voluntary hardship.
Voluntary hardship is exactly what it sounds like - choosing to engage in practices that are uncomfortable/scary/demanding. Depending on the “hardship” a person chooses to engage in, the positive effects can touch on different areas of our psychological well-being as well as create helpful physiological adaptations. A simple example of this is short-term cold exposure - uncomfortable in the moment, but with benefits ranging from a heightened immune response, improved fatty acid utilization, and higher sleep quality to name just three.
The value in seeking discomfort is something that we recognized as humans a long time ago and has been embedded in countless religious teachings and philosophical frameworks with the knowledge that elective confrontation with the threatening or unknown often has a curative effect. What is particularly challenging about living in the modern world however, is the aforementioned abundance of pleasure/comfort opportunities. For a lot of folks it has become nearly impossible to electively get uncomfortable as a result of excessive comfort being their baseline.
On this note, an often overlooked benefit to choosing to seek discomfort is a certain recalibration of a person’s behavior and attitude towards pleasure. The numbing effect of excessive pleasure (a dry “pleasure well”) described earlier can slowly be reset through intentional decision making based around any combination of self-discipline, delayed gratification, or fear mastery. The difficulty in this recalibration is just like anything worthwhile in life, it takes effort, sacrifice, and strength.
One final thought on this concept - the starting point/direction is going to be completely different for every individual. Some folks have long since melted into their couch and a good first “hardship” might just be a 10 minute walk before lunch. For others, it might look like a break from social media, or for others, reaching out to a family member once a week. What is difficult/challenging for one person is nothing for another. Pick things that push you and that you know deep down are tied to your growth as a human being - that will look different for everyone.
“True, I am in love with suffering, but I do not know if I deserve the honor.” - St. Ignatius